Packaging

A few weeks ago, I asked a friend for help running an errand because I have no reliable means of transportation other than public transportation. After finishing the errand, we went to stuff our fat faces on wings at a well-known wing restaurant. I'll let you figure out where we stopped to it; it's very popular as I'm told. Eventually, we went to a Barnes & Noble because I really wanted to buy a copy of Judge Dredd Complete Case Files. (Note: I'm not an asshole. He wasn't just used a chauffeur for the day, I told him to pick out anything he wanted and he did).

Since then, I've bought stuff from Barnes & Noble in person and online. Especially since I paid for the membership (which is paying for itself thanks to free shipping and the discounts). No, I am not a sell-out; I'd have to be getting paid in order to be a sell-out.

After that first Judge Dredd book, I went back to that same location and bought the Complete Case Files 02. Much to my dismay, however, some asshole had flipped through the pages and torn a hole through one and damaged the other pages as well. You bet your ass I was fucking pissed- still am, by the way.

I went back the next morning and explained my situation: "I don't want to sound bratty but there's a hole in a page and some of the pages have been damaged. I'm guessing somebody flipped through the pages and damaged them." The guy at the register understood completely and did the following: took back the damaged copy, and ordered a fresh copy to be delivered to me because that torn copy was the last one in stock at that location.

After I left the store, I ordered a copy of Tank Girl: Apocalypse online because I can and because reasons.

I'll just skip ahead to a few days after both orders came in, separately (obviously because I ordered them at separate times and in separate methods).

The packaging for both books was... perplexing. Tank Girl was in a folded thick cardboard folding box that you open by pulling some flaps on the sides and then tearing open.

(Part of) my most recent order (Bone: The Complete Cartoon Epic in One Volume and Seven Samurai) arrived about an hour ago. They came in a box with only crumpled up paper on top to protect the book and DVD set. I was very grateful that the people at UPS didn't accidentally damage the contents which could have easily happened given the pretty poor packaging.

I'm gonna be honest. The packaging Barnes & Noble uses honestly confuses me, and frankly sucks. Well, the box + crumbled paper combo sucks the most, the other method is surprisingly efficient though I would prefer the book to have been in shrink-wrap to further protect them from potential scratches when rubbing with the cardboard. A foolish notion but not entirely improbable, is it?

I've ordered some stuff from eBay and the packaging the sellers have used is way better. Maybe that's because I didn't order books and movies from eBay and because that's just the seller's preference: envelope and bubble wrap.

That being said, at least my copy of the Complete Case Files 02 came in without torn pages or anything of the sort.

As for the "part of" comment. I ordered Tank Girl: The Odyssey and am waiting for it to arrive tomorrow. It should have arrived today as well because I ordered it along with Bone and Seven Samurai. Hell, it would have made more sense for the box to contain Bone, Seven Samurai, and Tank Girl. But I guess stock is limited here and there and all that fun stuff.

Hmm.

Review: The Boys

The Boys

The Boys

1977

"Have you heard of The Boys?" she asked.
"Nope." I said.
"Well," she replied, "They are an old punk band and they [have] a song [called] 'Soda Pressing'."

At this point, I looked for and listened to the song. I was instantly fascinated by the song because it had been a while since I had heard exuberant ferocity. I was taken aback by what I saw as a neat pun. Neat, once you put the lyrics in context, by which I mean "listening to the song."

The song gave me a glimpse of this band and I knew I needed to hear more, so I looked up what album "Soda Pressing" was on and this is where my review starts.

The Boys' self-titled debut was released in 1977. You know, the year that is arguably "the" year for punk. Or at the very least, the year in which punk burst onto the global stage. As a result, the world was exposed to lot of bands (who were either starting or had already been around and just got a lot of attention as a result of the explosion) like The Sex Pistols (formed 1975, first album released in 1977), The Clash (formed 1976, first album released in 1977), X (formed 1977, first album released in 1980), The Germs (formed in 1977), and a long list of other bands that I won't write out because it'll seem like I'm just dropping names rather than actually proving a point about how 1977 was a great year for punk and how even though 1977 gave us a lot of bands, some would argue that the large number of bands (many of which are now iconic or legendary in some circles) also meant that other bands would go unnoticed unless you were a connoisseur of some sort. Some bands include The Vibrators, The Saints (though they were around since 1974 like The Ramones) and, of course, The Boys.

Ahem.

The Boys' self-titled debut is a ferociously merry 14 track assault on the senses that you'll enjoy. The reason I say merry is because the lyrics aren't as snarling (or arguably cynical) as other bands at the time were, nor are they riddled with a chaotic sense of gloom and doom that one would come to think of punk. Though I'd like to make it clear that this does not mean I would write off The Boys as pop-punk or proto-pop-punk or anything of the sort because of the ferocity which I will get into after you stop reading this sentence. I say ferocious (or ferocity, if you want to split hairs) because the sound is where it's at, for me.

Chainsaw buzzing distorted guitars, fast and steady pace, energy, and traces of humor. The album starts strong and never slows down.

I admit that the flow of the album can get a little awkward at times but never to the point of derailing the album. I also admit that I lied when I said the album never slows down. It does but not the degree one would think when that phrase comes to mind. It doesn't awkwardly halt to put down the chainsaw buzzing guitars and pick up a mandolin, is what I'm saying. It merely shifts gears to a comparatively less-fast speed for a moment and then goes back to being that raucous grinning machine ("First Time" following "Soda Pressing" and "No Money" or "Keep Running" following "Cop Cars"). Not an extreme shift but a noticeable and enjoyable one.

What I also enjoy about the album is the instruments primarily how the piano is used throughout as a foil to the guitar and drums. There you have the guitars and drums being furious, and then there's the piano just standing there smiling and bobbing its head while the guitar and drums continue to rage on and on.

The only problem I can think of, if any, is that the album isn't long enough. But this issue is remedied with enough searching and perseverance because you'll eventually come across the 1999 re-release that includes as bonus tracks some of their even more lighthearted work as The Yobs and their Christmas themed music, including a damn fine rendition of "Run Rudolph Run".

Overall, a very enjoyable album that you can listen to over and over.

"Teeeeeeeeeee hee" she later said.

9/10

Questions Nobody Asked (an Update)

It's quite obvious I haven't been providing content lately. And it should also be obvious that I am still alive.

I'd like to take a moment to answer questions nobody has asked, and in doing so provide an update on the state of things (or thangs) around here.

Dude, what the fuck?
Uhh. I've been gone because I haven't had a stable internet connection that would allow me to stay connected long enough to post something. As of a few days ago, this has changed. I now have a stable internet connection.

What have you been up to?
I have been working and, in the process, making money. That's how I can afford a stable internet connection and purchasing comic books, as I've mentioned earlier. And seemingly useless stuff from eBay. I've also been growing out my facial hair so my pen name isn't a total lie. The red is still there. I have to trim it for work though so I can't walk around with it untamed like before.

Will you vanish again?
I'll try not to. I plan to stick around for as long as I can and provide you with something to read that will entertain and maybe make a spark fly in your mind.

So yes, I have a stable internet connection which I will use to post more often (that is, more than one post per month).

As for those Nine Inch Nails album reviews, you bet your ass they'll all be done. In fact, I'm giving myself a deadline: before I see them in November. And while I'm on the subject of reviews, I'll be expanding beyond just music album reviews. Keep an eye out for reviews of written and filmed works: books, and movies.

Things are looking up.

I might buy sunglasses.

Review: Lucha Libre (by Jerry Frissen)

Lucha Libre

Jerry Frissen, various artists

2006

In this review, I use "issue" in the same way one would use "trade paperback" or "volume" though it'd be easier to just say "collected edition", wouldn't it?

I've been reading and buying a number of comic books lately. 

Mostly Judge Dredd (by way of the Complete Case Files), Batman (including but not limited to: Court of Owls, City of Owls, Black Glove), some of Jeph Loeb's work (Spider-Man Blue, Daredevil Yellow, Hush), The Walking Dead, Preacher, Supreme Power, and I'm waiting for Bone to come in the mail.

I've enjoyed most of what I've been reading though I must have admit that reading Jeph Loeb has made me recognize plot twists right away even if it's not a Jeph Loeb story. Or maybe my cynicism, or the fact that a number of his stories however gripping and well-told are ultimately formulaic. Read and enjoy some of them and you'll recognize what I call "The Loeb Blow."

Anyway, recently, a friend turned me on to some issues of Lucha Libre, a series by Jerry Frissen that has some of the things I enjoy and am interested in: supernatural creatures, lucha libre, and weird premises.

Unfortunately, that's where any praise ends because as I told my friend after reading the first of the three issues he lent me ("Introducing: The Luchadores Five"):

"Lucha Libre (1) suffers from poor execution and not enough delivery even for setting the foundation. It doesn't set the stage very well. It's okay at best. It breaks under its own weight in the sense that the premise is interesting but the delivery isn't."

And it's true. The premise of luchadores facing off against werewolves in Los Angeles (I'm already very interested) should be a goldmine of some really weird shit and striking artwork but maybe that's the problem. It bit off more than it could chew and instead of delivering something relatively unique, it delivers a middling, irritating, reading experience. 

Characters are introduced, scenarios are hinted at, motivations barely acknowledged, and then you turn the page and the story's over. Now you're staring at something else (Profesor Furia's brief exploits, which admittedly are more entertaining than the main attraction).

The characters are far too shallow and uninteresting to follow or even give a damn about even with hints of what I'm assuming are supposed to be interesting backstories. There are hints at something greater but subsequent issues serve nothing to the purpose: the next two issues just introduce more characters with fainter glimpses at backstories and motivations. 

Even the format in which the stories are presented are very restricting and actually hinder the work. It shouldn't be confined to small rectangles but should imitate the violent graceful poetry of lucha libre. Go on youtube and check out some lucha libre videos and you'll have an idea of what I'm talking about.

The whole time I was reading the issues I kept thinking "Get to the fucking point already." but the fucking point never arrived. Maybe because of the story-telling that failed to deliver on a wonderful premise or because I got tired of it and stopped after the third issue (Hele mei hoohiwahiwa). Maybe it actually gets better but I honestly don't care enough to pick up where I left off.

Lucha Libre promises the world on a silver platter (come on, admit it: you thought the premise was pretty fucking cool, or at the very least worthy of a read) but ultimately delivers nothing.

That's all I really want to say because this review would just get more erratic and whiny.

Honestly, do yourself a favor and find that cartoon ¡Mucha Lucha! It's far more entertaining, well-written, and interesting than Lucha Libre could ever hope to be.

3/10